An A+ for Nonsense

The honour for the providing the first Independence economic scare story of 2012 goes to the Scotsman, a seemingly infinite source of pro-Unionist tales of future doom and gloom. In its latest, and somewhat confusing anti-Independence piece by Executive Editor Bill Jamieson (Jan 4^th), separation will heap more untold misery on Scotland because as an independent sovereign state, it will lose the triple ‘A’ credit rating that it presently enjoys as part of the UK.

Putting as much spin on an analysis by Jim Leaviss, a fund manager for what the Scotsman calls “the giant M&G Group”, Mr Jamieson musters up yet another scare story to frighten Scotland’s bairns.

According to Mr Leaviss, an independent Scotland would struggle to sustain a triple ‘A’ credit rating. Give Mr Leaviss his due he also suggested that the remainder of the UK would do likewise. However, as this is not what the Edinburgh based rag wants to hear it simply spins the story as yet another dire consequence of the people of Scotland taking responsibility for their own affairs.

The ‘story’ as far as this lamentable excuse for a newspaper, is that the Scots would suffer. The reason? Well as usual it is because the country is “small”. According to Mr Leaviss, “Most small economies of an equivalent size [to Scotland] do not enjoy a triple ‘A’ status”.

Now I’m sure that is true on a global scale. But as we are talking about a country in Western Europe and a member of the EU, are we to assume (as one suspects we are) that if and it’s a big ‘if’, this was to be the case, Scotland would sink without trace.

According to Standard and Poor, smaller nations in Europe with triple ‘A’ status include, along with usual suspects of Luxembourg and Liechtenstein; Austria, Denmark, Finland, Norway, Sweden and Switzerland. In fact, Guernsey and the Isle of Man both have an AA+ credit rating. And it might also be worth noting that Slovenia, with AA-, has the same rating as China and Spain.

So, is there anything to fear here, as the Scotsman would have it?

Of course not.

Plenty countries get by without a triple ‘A’ rating. Losing that rating is only a problem for those countries which, like the UK in the past, have used it to borrow like there was no tomorrow and are now in serious trouble. Sound familiar

There was a time when triple ‘A’ was a size of battery. Now however, as a one of an ever increasing bag of economic buzz phrases, Mr Jamieson thinks it is time to add it to the Unionist armoury. But, while you can make of it what you want, as with the other sticks and stones at London’s disposal its efficacy as a weapon against independence can be undermined by readily available data. 

As for “economic analysts”, one will recall that they had ample opportunity to predict the present crisis and were found wanting. Whether we should give much credence to what they say now is a matter for further conjecture.

However, it does seem that the Unionist’s fixation on “size” has yet again been shown not to matter.

Nation Shall Speak Unto Region

This is the BBC i-Player.

Here we find Northern Ireland, Scotland and Wales listed as regions. But regions of what and where? It surely cannot be the UK. For that to be the case then England would also have to be on this list.

Unless, of course, England is the UK.

Ignorance? Arrogance? Indifference? Take your pick. The BBC are guilty of all three.

So, while London is calling to the far away world, the idea that “British” should not be confused with “English” still remains lost to those at the Anglo-Saxonphone.

Just For the Record

Not so long ago it was BBC Scotland apologising to Ally McCoist over a piece of selective editing in a deliberate attempt to suggest that the Rangers manager took a flippant view on sectarianism.

This week it is the Daily Record that has been forced to apologise. This time to Celtic boss Neil Lennon after Saturday's back page headline read “Who’s More Hated at Ibrox (is it Lennon or the Taxman). Celtic informed Scotland’s one-time leading daily that it would be withdrawing all cooperation with troubled tabloid until it received “a suitable and substantial apology”.

In fact it is a bit of a surprise that Rangers didn’t have a go at the rag as well.

The Monday edition of the Record offered an apology for using the word “Hated”. In a desperate attempt cover their arses the Record admitted that the headline was “a misjudgement and not intended to stoke up feelings before ahead of yesterday's match.”

The cringing continued with an apology for any offence that it may have caused Lennon, his family and supporters saying that “The Daily Record has a long history of condemning intolerance in all its forms.”

Well it does have a long history. And as such, people expect the editorial team to have better judgement. Its hard to imagine that those responsible for this headline underestimated the affect of the words that were used.

It was done for affect. That's what headlines do. Or at least thats what they're supposed to do. They tell the reader what the story is about. In this case the Record told all who read it that this story was about the “hatred” felt at Ibrox for the Parkhead boss. It was a typical tabloid headline for a typical tabloid story. Absolutely no evidence that anyone at Ibrox “hates” the taxman, let alone Neil Lennon, was offered in what was a tawdry piece shit-stirring.

However, like the BBC, the Record was quick to realise that it needs access to both halves of the ‘Old Firm'. Losing the support of either side would see the paper's sales drop even further. 

Just as in the case with McCoist, the media in Scotland have been found guilty of attempting to fan the flames. Only to get their fingers burned in the process.

Don’t Let Three Come Before Four.

It’s astonishing to think that that the BBC would even consider keeping BBC 3 at the expense of BBC 4. Changed and strange days indeed.

My feelings on “Three” have been made clear elsewhere on this blog.  However when you hear the likes of Ken Clark praising some of the channels programmes you might begin to wonder.

BBC 3 is, for the most part, tabloid telly for teenagers. At the forefront of dumbed-down television, its original remit has long since been consigned to the dustbin of quality television. 

Voyeuristic forays into the worlds of the dysfunctional and those less fortunate, with all the subtlety and morality that accompanied a Victorian freak show, has little  educational value and the channel’s attempts to disguise it as meaningful social documentary fail miserably.

“The World’s Strictest Parents”, “Don’t Tell the Bride”, “Young, Dumb and Living off Mum”, “Snog Marry Avoid”, “Under Age and Pregnant”, is a more than fair representation of the channel’s homemade output. All of which seem to be repeated ad nauseum.

Bulked out, only too readily, by jollies to music festivals (including the corporation’s very unhealthy relationship with the Glastonbury annual mud bath) and repeats from BBC 1 means that we have already seen much of what is on offer. And as good as the US imports “Family Guy” and “American Dad” are, even these wear thin on the umpteenth showing.  

And let’s not forget the irritating Cherry. “Cherry’s Body Dilemmas”, “Cherry’s Parenting Dilemmas” and “Cherry’s Cash Dilemmas” to name a few of Cherry’s dilemmas. One might wonder if it’s responsible to actually let Cherry out on her own. Perhaps see should stay in and watch the box – “Cherry’s So much Shite on the Telly Dilemmas”.

Left to their own devices, I have no doubt that “My Three Lesbian Mums”, “My Cross-dressing  Grandparents”, “I Married My i-Pod” and “I gave Birth to a Poltergeist” are coming our way soon.

Although BBC 4 is also blighted by the “rule of repeat”, its more eclectic programming, that encompasses both science and the arts, absolves it of the charges levelled at its spotty faced sibling.

It would be just as unacceptable to see the adolescent driven rubbish from “Three” share a channel with “Four”. Although I’m sure the programme makers would welcome the credibility that might come from association.

If there’s a niche, and it is a niche, for BBC 3, then its not at the expense of a channel that is superior in every way.

There’s plenty of rubbish like this on our screens as it is. There’s precious little quality.

There again, it only television.

McCoist Gets an Apology – But What About the Rest of Us?

Ally McCoist got an apology from BBC Scotland (sic) after they manipulated film footage to suggest that he took a flippant attitude to sectarian violence. But what about the rest of us who were, and not for the first time, deliberately lied to by the state sponsored broadcaster. The people of Scotland were treated with contempt and its time that the liars were kicked over the border to where they really want to be.

The Rangers’ manager, Ally McCoist has received an apology from the BBC in Scotland after it deliberately  manipulated footage from a press conference in an attempt to show the Ibrox boss taking what he referred to as “flippant” attitude towards sectarian-fuelled violence surrounding his side's games against Celtic. McCoist refused to speak to the BBC until they apologised.

In the clip McCoist was shown appearing to smile when answering a question about violence at Old Firm matches. This was followed by the reporter saying “Well it might not bother Mr McCoist”

The thing was that the footage showing the Rangers manager smiling was his reaction to a different question.

This wasn’t just a piece of clumsy editing. The voice-over on this portion of the film makes it all too clear that this was a deliberate attempt to mislead the viewers. But to what end?

Last season, when the Celtic manager was receiving death threats, the BBC chose to make a report from outside Ibrox. The obvious conclusion – to make the link between the attacks on Lennon and Rangers FC.

While no one can argue that sectarianism is no more manifest than through the actions of some of those that follow the Old Firm, filming this report outside the Rangers’ ground was a deliberate attempt to make an association that simply did not exist.

This is not the first time that creative editing has been used by the corporation north of the border.

Normally it is reserved for its anti-SNP propaganda. This was seen clearly when Reporting Scotland manipulated footage from the Scottish Parliament last November. In this pathetic little piece it appears as though First Minister, Alex Salmond is apparently mocking a statement by his Finance Minister, John Swinney. In fact he was reacting to a statement by the then leader of the Lib-Dems, Tavish Scott.

The lie can be seen here.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hn5T3e4Nk2I&feature=player_embedded 

The truth can be seen here.  

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m5nTcGkEEU8&feature=player_embedded

The actively pro-unionist stance taken by the BBC in Scotland is nothing new. Although in recent times it has become so obvious as to suggest that those in news and current affairs have given up any pretence of impartiality. 

It is the BBC's attitude to sectarianism that many might now question. It undoubtedly sees the problem as nothing more than an opportunity for sensationalism. A chance to do what it does best – continually put Scotland down in an attempt to reinforce the greatest lie of all – that Scotland and its people are incapable of self-determination.

While Ally McCoist has had his apology, that is not really good enough for the rest of us. We were told a lie. Not only that, what we got was yet another deliberate manipulation of the media to promote this lie.

It would be nice to see those responsible for this getting their arses kicked onto the dole.

That's not likely to happen though. And it is doubtful that it will deter the liars at BBC Scotland from carrying on with their agenda of treating the people of Scotland with contempt.

While the World Service is Cut – BBC 3 Carries on Regardless

As the cuts to  the BBC World Service results in an estimated audience drop of 30 million listeners BBC 3 continues to stimulate the intellect of Britain's youth with educational works such as “Snog, Marry or Avoid.” – a make-under concept where six inches of make up is chipped off some Oompa Loompa munter in an attempt to make her look normal. Then a decision is made as to whether you would give her one or run a mile.

This week saw the BBC World Service (WS) ended its radio broadcasts in Spanish to Latin America. Launched in 1938 to counter the propaganda of Nazi Germany and fascist Italy, many might say “So what.” But, along with the other cuts being made at the WS, this will see the audience drop by an estimated 30 million listeners. They'll go somewhere else for their news in English and that means in many cases a return to news sources that will range from the obviously biased to downright lies. And remember that the WS is important in those very areas of the world where there’s not so much a manipulation of the media rather, an outright control.

No matter what we in the UK might think about the BBC and any perceived political agendas and bias, they are by far the most and in some cases the only reliably independent and unbiased news source in many part of the globe. The news will still be available via the internet and mobile phones. But as we’ve seen of late, access to these services can be easily removed by Governments when they feel threatened.

During the Falklands War the WS journalist came under intense pressure from the then Conservative Government for retaining their objectivity.

There’s not much that BBC can do. The World Service is presently funded by the Foreign and Commonwealth Office (FCO) and they've cut the budget by 16%.

However, starting in 2014, the World Service will be funded by the license fee and if this had been the situation at present there might have been a strong case to make cuts elsewhere.  

An obvious candidate for the knife at any time is the piss-poor BBC 3.

Does anyone know what this channel's remit is?

A fanciful description can be found on their website. Decide for yourself if you think they are talking about the same channel.

Sure, we get the usual bollocks about high quality thought-provoking and original programmes but, originality doesn’t equate to quality. Not on this channel anyway. Neither is much of it innovative.

What we get under the banner of education and learning are programmes where a celebrity slapper shows some budding celebrity slappers how to put their make-up and clothes on so that they too might someday marry a pot-ugly but extremely rich footballer. Much of their so-called educational programmes are nothing more the now commonplace voyeuristic nonsense that veers from the extremes of physical disabilities to drunken tossers spewing up in the street outside some Spanish night club.

This can, is and has been seen on any number of commercial channels ad nauseum.

“The Lock Up” – drunks getting locked up.

“The World’s Strictest Parents” – where they send a couple of dysfunctional teenagers, who have promised to play up to the cameras, to spend a week with the Hitler family in Texas.

“Hotter than My Daughter” – a makeover series where a teenager is tarted up to look as daft as her mother.

“Snog, Marry or Avoid.” – makeunder concept where six inches of make up is chipped off some Oompa Loompa munter in an attempt to make her look normal. Then a decision is made as to whether you would give her one or run a mile.

Now as none of the above shows are scripted, they and many more, fall into the category of factual programming and that means educational. If one of the drunks sings you can bet they’ll file it under the “Arts”. This one supposes makes them intellectually stimulating. (A check of the programme categories on the i-player shows this a common ploy right across the BBC.) And if one of the inebriates promises never to drink again then that will no doubt be seen as fulfilling the channel’s rather Orwellian idea that they should have a role in “Sustaining citizenship and civil society”.

BBC 3 can claim no more than a handful of quality programmes. The “Mighty Bush” aside, much of that quality depends on repeats of BBC 1’s DR Who and American animation from the stable of the excellent Seth McFarlane which can also be seen elsewhere. It is not just an example of youth led television at its worst; it is an example of any kind of television at its worst. Furthermore, the fickle teenage audience that it is aimed at is greatly enhanced by its ability to reshow popular programmes from BBC 1. but because they target a specific age group they can claim success from meagre viewing figures.

The channel quite rightly continues to receive criticism from others in the industry for promising all sorts of things to get on the air and then doing whatever they like. Even after this they carry on regardless. How they get away with it remains a mystery. But, if they continue down the road of aping commercial television then their claim to the license fee will become increasingly hard to justify, if it can be justified at all. While ITV, SKY and the rest can happily go about their business on the basis that it is only TV, the pretentious guff that that emanates from the BBC will remain just that as long as they make the kind of mind-numbing crap that is BBC 3. 

On the other hand, the top brass at the Beeb get paid enormous amounts of cash to run the corporation which the rest of pay for, with the exclusion of teenagers of course, so they must know what their doing.

Ageism at the BBC.

Good to see that former Countryfile presenter, Miriam O’Reilly, has won her employment tribunal against the BBC on the grounds of ageism and victimisation. It is way past time that the BBC, and the rest, got pulled up for this sort of thing.

Former BBC1 controller Jay Hunt however claimed that O’Reilly’s claims were “entirely and categorically untrue” and “profoundly distressing and utterly offensive.” Must have stayed up all night working on that one.

The fact is that the tribunal agreed with O’Reilly, not the BBC. They were found guilty as charged.

But, let’s think back here.
Who was it that thought it a good idea to give a rural affairs programme a seven o’ clock evening slot at the weekend?
I suspect no one. But their hand was forced when the corporation decided to empty the coffers to show motor racing.

The BBC is pretty much obliged to show a programme like Countryside. But the ‘out of the way’ Sunday morning, amongst religion and politics, became problematic when they decided to splash out millions to broadcast Formula 1 racing. Southern hemisphere events require the Sunday morning. Something had to go. No one wants politics at primetime. And a religious affairs programme, hot on the heels of “Songs of Praise”, is unthinkable at anytime of the day.

However, there was no way that the programme, which dealt earnestly with rural affairs, could have been moved to a primetime slot in its old format. Primetime requires the lowest common denominator. It must be populist. It cannot be challenging. It needed presenters that primetime viewers recognised (even if I don’t).
Miriam O’Reilly along with the other female presenters, Juliet Morris and Michaela Strachan, didn’t fit the bill.

So, a new look sexed-up Countryfile was the order of the day. What we got was a bland magazine format designed for urban viewers more interested in the traditional countryside pursuits of off-road racing, paint-balling and leaving litter all over the place was the solution.
Out went the authority that comes with experienced presenters and in came the shallow ambition of youth. A perception that the attraction is more with what the primetime slot could mean for their careers than any interest countryside still lingers. 

The Beeb have much of the rise in viewing figures Countryfile does alright in the Beeb’s viewing list getting around six-plus million viewers and generally keeping its place in their top-ten list.
But, it should be remembered that viewing figures do not necessarily reflect programme quality. Rather, they show viewer choice. And that depends on what the other lot are showing. A quick look at ITV’s offerings for this time-slot show that Countryfile lacks serious competition. And let’s not forget that multi-channel broadcasters such as the BBC quite rightly manipulate their channel schedules to offer choice not competition.

Countryfile is not a story of a programme being moved to new tome-slot. It is about a programme being in the road of motor racing. It is about a programme being reinvented for a whole new audience. An audience that by and large has little interest in rural affairs.

And while I would recognise Miriam O’Reilly, Juliet Morris and Michaela Strachan if I met them in a busy city street, I can’t say the same of their replacements supposing I saw them hanging around a farm doing a piece on “Where Milk Comes From.”

Naomi Campbell. Inconvenience and Truth

At his trial in being held in The Hague, in front of a United-Nations backed Special Court for Sierra Leone, Charles Taylor faces 11 charges of war crimes and crimes against humanity over his alleged role in the brutal civil war in neighbouring Sierra Leone, where he accused of selling diamonds and buying weapons for Sierra Leone's Revolutionary United Front rebels, responsible for widespread atrocities and who were notorious for hacking off the hands and legs of civilians during their decade-long war.

Word on the street is that he pretty much did it.

But how many people, in this country, were aware that the trial was taking place. Well, I would venture a guess that, until last week, very few.

But, thanks to the ‘cult of the celebrity’ it suddenly had news value. Naomi Campbell, I believe that she is some sort of anorexic clothes hanger, was subpoenaed to appear as a witness for the prosecution.

The prosecution must now be regretting getting the British supermodel Naomi Campbell, to testify that Taylor had gifted her ‘Blood Diamonds’.

The fact that they had to subpoena her, should have given them an insight into the sort of witness that she would be.

Anyone who has taken the slightest of passing interests in the twilight-zone existence of this self-centred prima donna would not have been surprised by the blasé attitude taken by the reality-challenged Campbell to the proceedings.

She couldn’t even be arsed to turn up on time. And when asked why she hadn't wanted to appear in court, she told the world:

"This is a big inconvenience for me.”

Well, “Fuck Me”!

As inconvenient as having your hands or legs chopped off?

But, I digress.

The media, who have shown scant interest in the trial up till now, swarmed to The Hague. And Campbell even got a judge to rule that the paparazzi would not be allowed to photograph her entering the court.

Font page of the papers. The lead on TV News.

A supermodel. A genocidal dictator. Blood diamonds. Courtroom drama with dodgy and conflicting testimony.

This was the stuff of . . . well . . .

Soap opera.

And sadly, that was is attraction.

The trial will continue. But not on the front pages or as the lead stories at six o’ clock. The truth is that mind-numbing media and the mind-numbed that it drip feeds this rubbish to, are no longer interested.

That is unless; the defence can come up with a dippy celebrity of their own.

Bampots Lose Out in The Scheme if Things

There’s trouble in ‘The Scheme’, where the stars of the BBC’s hit comedy say their lives have been wrecked by the programme.

The show’s leading lights (approx 1 watt between them), Marvin and Chris have hit out at the producers saying they were made to look stupid. I don’t think they can claim the credit for that.

Train-spotter, Marvin, 30 (No joke - he’s 30), hit out: "The BBC were only interested in showing me make a fool of myself. They wanted a circus and we were the clowns." Well, if the funny hat fits.

In the first episode, Marvin was arrested twice - for drug dealing and assaulting his girlfriend. He also had his house burgled and suffered a drugs overdose. The girlfriend was also convicted of trying to smuggle heroin into the jail where he was banged-up.

And he was really pissed off after being told the reality show is to be screened across Britain - with subtitles for English and Welsh viewers. Uneasy with his new-found international star status, Einstein moaned:

"It's bad enough being made to look like a complete idiot in your own country - now we face the same sort of reaction in England.”

Chris, not to be outdone, was filmed leaping out of his teenage girlfriend’s bedroom window to avoid being arrested by police.

This Riz-la short of a joint also told the country on camera that he owed drug dealers £400 for cocaine he was supposed to sell but snorted instead.

His girlfriend’s mum also told us that Chris smashed up her car after she refused to let him see her daughter late at night.

Chris and the burd now have a seven-week-old daughter, which he struggles to see because his girlfriend's mum, Kay, has banned him from their house.

This has been one of the best things on telly for ages and I look forward to the remaining two episode, the judicial system permitting.

If Marvin and Chris have a problem then they should it up with scriptwriters.

Scots as Unhealthy as English.

According to a study, by the boffins at Glasgow University, unhealthy living is almost universal in Scotland, with virtually everyone in the country putting themselves at risk.

They identified five factors which contributed most to disease in richer countries - smoking, drinking, poor diet, physical inactivity and obesity.

The report found that 97% of Scots had at least one of the risk factors.

Some 55% of the population had three or more, while 20% had four or all five risk factors. Poverty was found to increase the risks.

This has been, and will be, rammed down our throat (deep-fried of course) all day long on the London based news. And no doubt BBC North Britain’s flagship news programme ‘Reporting Scotland’ (sic) will be unable to resist an opportunity to tell us what an inferior lot we are.

But before despair has you reaching for another deep-fried woodbine and a Buckfast pie, consider the twat on SKY News who took such delight in introducing the story.

“If you’re from Scotland you might want to cover your ears for our next story.” He grinned.

Alas, it came as a great blow to SKY-man’s smug superiority when he was told by the head boffin that the Scottish results were similar to those in a recent survey of English behaviour.

There was an audible groan from the balloon as he was deflated.

Still, that aside, I don’t think we should kill ourselves just to keep up with the neighbours. 

Frankenbollocks

Scientist have moved a step closer to "playing God" after the creation of the world's first synthetic living cell. So the Scotsman (sic) newspaper tells us.

The problem the media has when it comes to reporting ‘science’ is that, in general, they know fuck all about it.

The piece informatively illuminated with a photograph of Hollywood’s ‘Herman Munster’ version of ‘Frankenstein’s Monster’ is typical of the media’s approach to science.

Nowhere in the piece are scientists accused of "playing God" by the usual . We are just supposed to accept that this is what they are doing – fact.

And if their not “Playing at God”, they’re looking for the “God Particle” or creating “Frankenstein Food”.

Here’s the thing.

Both Frankenstein and God are characters in books. Science is real.

On that basis I look forward to the ultimate headline:

“Scientists Create God”

Obscured by Clouds.

Excellent picture on the BBC’s website, taken from Reuters, and accompanying a story about the ‘Ash Cloud’.

Showing Edinburgh airport it is annotated with:

“Edinburgh Airport had been closed to all flights earlier on Monday”

Now, are we supposed to believe that the cloud in the picture is the ‘ash’.

I wouldn’t be surprised.

Americans Should Sort Out Their Own Hooligans First

A planned football match (that’s the one where you use your foot to kick the ball and don’t throw it or carry for a couple of yards in between the adverts) between Rangers and Celtic to be held at Fenway Park in Boston this summer is now in doubt after a newspaper campaign to halt the derby in the city after claims that Rangers fans could run riot.

In a local rag, ‘The Boston Globe’, Mark Stokes wrote: "One can't help wonder how the city of Boston will fare after a Fenway game, should the Rangers faithful feel the need to express themselves, as they did in Manchester in 2008.”

"Following their team's defeat in the UEFA Cup Final, the blue-clad fans left parts of Manchester in a shambles and forced the local constabulary to don riot gear to restore order.”

Writing on the Ibrox Disaster in 1971 Stokes claimed: “It is widely accepted that the tensions between Celtic and Rangers fans played a major part in the 66 deaths.”

A suggestion that angered both sets of fans.

After complaints, The Globe withdrew the article from its website and Stokes apologised.

But the Globe began to ‘stoke’ this up a week ago, when another of the newspaper's bloggers, Garrett Quinn, wrote of the proposed game: "It's Catholic v Protestant.” “It's Irish v British.”

Now, normally any opinion about the rest of us that emanates from the most parochial country in the history of the planet wouldn’t merit a response, other than to point out that it would undoubtedly be as ill-informed as the CIA, Fox News or the guy that tells their military where to drop their bombs.

I have no intention of getting into any argument about whose fans done what, where and when. Nor am I going to suggest that there is any connection between the content of the stories and the fact that ‘The Globe‘ is published in Boston. What I am going to argue is that the US is a country in denial of it’s own sports fan violence.

Riots at sports events occur far more frequently in the US than the UK. But American popular culture, almost without exception, portrays the "hooligan" as a ‘soccer’ fan.

It doesn’t seem to matter that many college games end in drunken mob violence and that numerous American city centres see running battles between sports fans and riot police. The US sports media, indeed the media in general, continues to present hooliganism as something that doesn’t happen in America.

This blinkered provincialism saw the 1996 decision by the US State Department to warn US visitors to London that Millwall was as dangerous as Guatemala. A country which, at the time, was more or less governed by right-wing death squads.

A typically breathtaking example of these ill-informed double standards can be found in an article by Mickey Charles on sportsnetwork.com

Although he points out that: "There are riots in the streets after a championship comes to town in any sport. Looting, burning cars, terrorising women and ripping their clothes off as part of the ceremony seems to have reached obscene levels ..."

But he goes on to claim that this is nothing compared to the psychopaths of European football when he suggests: "... the fans rushing on to the field don't want to embrace the players. They are carrying knotted ropes used historically for lynching*, rocks, beer bottles poised to be thrown and whatever else is not nailed down. Frenzied followers of one team chase down those of the opponents, not to congratulate for a good effort, but to dismember."

*(For those unaware ‘Lynching’ is an old tradition in the US. Much favoured by the KKK in southern states)

Have none of these guys been to Philadelphia?

At a 1980s Philadelphia Eagles against the Dallas Cowboys game a Cowboys fan in a wheelchair was pushed to the top of a steep ramp by two Philadelphia fans. They ripped his Dallas shirt to shreds after threatening to push him down the ramp.

In 1997, Veterans stadium – the then ground of the Eagles - saw a fully functional court set up it’s basement, along with a small jail, after a game against San Francisco resulted in an estimated 60 fights. When the Lincoln Financial Field (the team's current stadium) opened in 2003, it was equipped with similar facilities.

And you know that things haven’t improved when one of heir own fans, Al Petrillo, talks about the “shit-faced drunk and out of control” fans beating up and breaking the leg of a 60-year-old Washington Redskin’s fan. Petrillo has worked with security at Philadelphia Flyers ice hockey games where, violence is just as rife. "Especially in the play-offs. There's fights at every game. There was this guy in a [New Jersey] Devils jersey, just sat there minding his own business. A Flyers fan walked past him then just turned around and just beat the piss out of him."

The reputation of the Eagles fans is so bad that they were congratulated by ESPN.com., when they failed to boo a little blind boy with cerebral palsy when he faltered while singing the national anthem during a snowstorm.

But it’s not all about Eagles’ fans.

Here are just some of the more famous examples of US fan violence:

In 1974 the ‘Nickel Beer Brawl’ at a baseball game at Cleveland Stadium caused the Cleveland Indians to forfeit the game to the Texas Rangers after drunken fans started a riot.

In 1984, Kansas State defeated KU at football. After the match Kansas fans rioted, smashing windows and signs, overturning a car, and uprooting street signs. Police who attempted to intervene were chased by students who hurled obscenities and bottles at them. Five police officers were cornered for a time and pelted with rocks and bottles. At one point, the Kansas Highway Patrol called Governor John W. Carlin's office to request that he declare a state of emergency and send Kansas National Guard troops to Aggieville

Two years later, despite a number of precautions, Aggieville was the site of another riot after Kansas State again defeated KU. Students wearing t-shirts that said ‘Riotville’ and ‘Riot II’ mingled amongst the crowds that filled the main street outside the bars. As night fell, the crowd again turned violent. Almost every building in Aggieville had its windows smashed.

In 1984 (one night after the first Aggieville Riot), violence erupted outside of Tiger Stadium in Detroit after the Detroit Tigers defeated the San Diego Padres in the World Series. 

A Tigers’ fan holding a World Series pennant in front of an overturned and burning Detroit Police car.

In 1990, a victory celebration in Detroit after the NBA Finals degenerated into a riot that left 7 dead.

In 1993 three people died in Chicago after the Chicago Bulls won the NBA championship.

In 1998, Denver Broncos fans rioted in the streets of Denver after their team won Super Bowl XXXII.

In 2000 Los Angeles Lakers fans rioted in the streets of Los Angeles after the Lakers victory over the Indiana Pacers in the NBA Finals - starting bonfires dancing and stomping on parked cars, and even turning a news van over.

In 2003 in Oakland, California fans rioted and destroyed property after the Oakland Raiders lost to the Tampa Bay Buccaneers in Super Bowl XXXVII. The rioting fans left several streets strewn with burnt-out cars and smashed glass. One McDonald's restaurant was looted and set on fire. Three fire-fighters suffered injuries while at least 23 people were arrested, in most cases on charges of public drunkenness. When the trouble broke out, huge squads of officers marched through the streets and authorities closed off some areas of the city.

In 2004, in a NBA game between the Indiana Pacers and Detroit Pistons, a brawl erupted between Pacers players and Pistons supporters.

And just in case a trip even to nearby Philadelphia is too much for the hacks at the Boston Globe, they might like to reflect on the events of October 2004, when fans of the Boston Red Sox rioted just outside of Fenway Park after the Red Sox won the American League Championship Series over the New York Yankees. And to take a quote from Mr Stokes “forced the local constabulary to don riot gear to restore order.” In restoring that order, Emerson College student, Victoria Snelgrove, was killed. The result of being hit in the eye by a pepper spray pellet fired from an FN 303.

Stokes need not look as far as Glasgow for a story. There is one on his doorstep.

It’s a story about a long-term deeply rooted and entirely home-grown problem that affects American sport that no one is willing to recognise exists.

It’s about mindless drunken violence inside and outside stadiums.

It’s about cop-taunting, car-burning, vandalism and death.

It’s about hooliganism.

It’s about putting your own house in order before pointing your finger at others.

Cuairt Criochnachaidh Cupa CIS

In many areas of the Highlands, such as here in Lochaber, radio listeners depend on FM as the AM programme is so bad as to be non-existent. As it is there are two FM frequencies that Radio Scotland broadcasts on. One carries the mainstream programming in English, while the other opts out for the most part to broadcast programmes in Gaelic from Radio Nan Gaidheal

A good idea on the face of it.

But it wouldn’t be BBC Scotland if they didn’t get it wrong.

Here’s the latest example.

The CIS Cup Final between St Mirren (from Paisley) and Rangers (from Glasgow) was covered live, in Gaelic, on the Gaelic FM frequency. The other FM frequency broadcast the usual mainstream programming.

So if you live in Lochaber, where there’s no AM reception and you don’t speak Gaelic, then you could forget turning to the radio to follow the match. And you would have been far from being alone.

For although Lochaber has a high percentage of people who speak Gaelic within it’s population, the vast majority do not.

Still you could watch it on BBC 1 Scotland. Here though, even with the all-singing, all-dancing digital format, you couldn’t get the commentary in Gaelic.

It’s not as though the folks in the Lochaber don’t have digital telly. The place is fair infested with satellite dishes.

For the BBC it’s matter of geography not culture. Two things that they consistently show they know nothing about. Knowledge-based decisions and less jumping through politically correct hoops every time Adolf McTeuchter shouts would go some way to providing the service that they are supposed to.  

From Riches to Rags

It was once described as “a licence to print money.” Now ITV/STV can’t even make a regional news programme because it’s too expensive.

The Scottish News Consortium which is made up of DC Thomson, the Herald and Times Group, Johnston Press and Tinopolis (part owned by private equity company Vitruvian Partners), has been chosen as the preferred bidder for the Independently Funded News Consortia (IFNC) to produce regional news for STV – Shite Television for those who’ve never seen it.

SNC’s newspaper titles include Scotland on Sunday, The Scotsman, The Herald, Sunday Herald, The Evening Times, The Sunday Post, The Beano and The Dandy

Along with television SNC are being tasked with delivering local news content across the web, mobile, and other new platforms.  

The independent (sic) selection panel led by Richard Hooper seems to have got all excited about how television, local newspapers, the internet and local radio could work together in new and interesting ways. Those new and interesting ways may well be the delivery of all your news from newspaper groups with a common political agenda who have seen the sales of their rags plummet over the last few years. Not because of the internet. Rather because, they are tired and poor imitations of what good journalism is.

In the case of The Sunday Post - name one hard scoop it has ever broke (‘Oor Wullie Gets a New Bucket’ aside.)

Mr Hooper is also taken by the “strong proposals for regional, local and hyperlocal/community news.” We can now expect the ‘Central Belt’ to be renamed ‘Hyperlocal’ any day now.

The fear is that these pilots, once started, won’t be easily reversed, as they test new ways of providing news, and pump in an initial subsidy from the BBC licence fee, worth £40m over two years.

I doubt that they can ever graduate from public subsidy to become self-financing and there’s little doubt that SNC hope that the subsidy will be continued after two years.

Ben Bradshaw, Secretary of State for Culture, Media and Sport, (a guy with a Degree in German, who use to be a reporter and a less than successful Minister for Health,) is sure that it is a good idea.

Listen if this was a good idea they would role it out in London and the Home Counties.  

The Conservatives are opposed in principle to using public money to subsidise the regional news on Channel 3 and have said they will examine whether the scheme can be scrapped if they win the forthcoming General Election. It’s not a reason to vote for them but, if enough of the rest of you do . . .

Here’s the thing – I don’t want any of my licence money going to fund any sort of programme on the piss-poor commercial STV. I’ve seen the news on STV. Fuck knows where they spend the money! They have an obligation to provide regional news; if they can’t honour that obligation then they should fuck off and let others run the company.

End of story.

Well, probably not . . .

They're Having a Lava

The Dettol Advert says:

“Some bacteria are almost indestructible. They can even survive in lava. So think how easily the bacteria in your kitchen can survive.”

Bacteria that survives in lava?

Bollocks! I hear you cry.

And despite some confusion on the matter – you’d be right.

Now you might have heard that ‘Bacteria’ have been found close to molten lava and deep sea vents, where they utilize the heat.

The extremophile known as Archaebacteria are the oldest organisms living on the earth. They are unicellular prokaryocytes and belong to the kingdom, Archae. They were first discovered in 1977 and classified as bacteria. But, although they appear like bacteria when observed under the microscope, Archaebacteria are quite different from bacteria and eukaryotic organisms.

Archae survive in environments such as volcanic sea vents releasing sulphide-rich gases, hot springs or boiling mud around volcanoes at temperatures up to about 113C.

However, the temperature of lava is generally between 700°C-1,200°C

So bollocks and weasel words all round.

Two things to bear in mind:

Millions of years of evolution would suggest that Archaebacteria are unlikely to be living on your general kitchen surfaces.

All forms of archaebacteria are non-pathogenic.