'Gay Dog' Banned from Australian Restaurant

An Australian restaurant has been ordered to apologise and pay compensation after they barred a blind man because a waiter thought his guide dog was gay.

Ian Jolly was told he could not take his dog Nudge into Adelaide's Thai Spice after his partner, Chris Lawrence, asked if she could bring a guide dog into the restaurant.

The waiter thought that she was asking if gay dogs were allowed.

Even after showing the guide dog’s documentation they were still refused entry.

The restaurant was ordered by the Equal Opportunity Tribunal to pay Mr Jolly AU$1,500 in compensation.

The restaurant owners said “The staff genuinely believed that Nudge was an ordinary pet dog which had been de-sexed to become a gay dog.”

Now, I’m no expert on the subject of gay or dogs but, for the life of me I can’t imagine what difference it would have made whether the dog was a raging queen or not. Nor do I understand the concept of de-sexing a dog to make it gay.

But, I do know that if you try saying “Guide Dog” with an Australian accent…

Woman Bites Man - After Being Called Fat

A woman in Lincoln, Nebraska was arrested on suspicion of felony assault after she bit a chunk off a guy’s right ear after being called “fat”.

The guy had been at a party when an argument broke out. And when he suggested that 21-year-old Anna Godfrey might be eating too much he quickly regretted it.

The chunk of ear was not found.

Make up your own punch-line.

Nursery Staff Confiscate Two-Year-Old's Cheese Sandwich

Staff at a nursery confiscated a cheese sandwich from two-year-old Jack Ormisher because it broke their healthy eating rules.

You see. There you go. This is why I’m a fat bastard. I thought a cheese sandwich was healthy.

The two-year-old burst into tears and when his father picked him up from the food fascists at the Westfield Children’s Centre, in south Wigan, who told Jack’s father that the wee fella’s sandwiches should in future include lettuce or tomato – so they could be classed as a ‘snack’ rather than ‘lunch’.

Ah! I see now! Lettuce and tomato – snack. Cheese – lunch.

Chips? You have to by them off that dodgy bloke that hangs about behind the lock-ups.

Young Jack’s mother has moved him to a new nursery where he can have his cheese piece in peace.

Sailor Circumnavigates the Isle of Sheppey – Again and Again

This is the kind of stuff that shows that Britannia still rules the waves. A nation of seafarers indeed!

A man who thought he was sailing around the British coastline had in fact circling off the coast the Isle of Sheppey for a day and a half.

Using a road map to navigate, he set off from Gillingham heading for Southampton, the plan being to keep the land on his right.

And because he could drive in his car to Southampton using a single tank of fuel, he thought only needed one tank of fuel for the vessel.

A lifeboat rescued him after he ran out of fuel.

Coastguards, who grabbed hold of the budding Columbus at Queenborough, advised him that the best way to Southampton would be by train.

However, undeterred, he said he would get some more fuel and get underway.

But he did have one last question “Is it left or right when I come out of the Swale."

He’s not been seen since. So he must have made it to Southampton.

You think?

Man Fined for Reversing Into His Own Driveway

Maxwell Cannon was issued with a £60 fixed penalty notice and informed that he was committing a traffic offence for waiting on the zigzag markings of a pedestrian crossing outside his home in Harrington, near Workington in Cumbria.

When he told Plod that he was waiting for a break in the heavy traffic to reverse onto his property he was told that he could have driven forward into the driveway. When he pointed out that reversing out onto a main road was against the Highway, he was told (I suppose) “tough shit”

He appealed the fine.

The court accepted that he had intended to conduct his driving in a manner designed to mitigate the inconvenience to other traffic but that did not afford him an exemption under the regulations.

OK - What now for this guy?

If his drive was there before the zigzag markings then surely this can’t be his fault.

But on the other hand…

TPUC might offer a solution for others in a similar situation with the process of NCRTS

Americans Should Sort Out Their Own Hooligans First

A planned football match (that’s the one where you use your foot to kick the ball and don’t throw it or carry for a couple of yards in between the adverts) between Rangers and Celtic to be held at Fenway Park in Boston this summer is now in doubt after a newspaper campaign to halt the derby in the city after claims that Rangers fans could run riot.

In a local rag, ‘The Boston Globe’, Mark Stokes wrote: "One can't help wonder how the city of Boston will fare after a Fenway game, should the Rangers faithful feel the need to express themselves, as they did in Manchester in 2008.”

"Following their team's defeat in the UEFA Cup Final, the blue-clad fans left parts of Manchester in a shambles and forced the local constabulary to don riot gear to restore order.”

Writing on the Ibrox Disaster in 1971 Stokes claimed: “It is widely accepted that the tensions between Celtic and Rangers fans played a major part in the 66 deaths.”

A suggestion that angered both sets of fans.

After complaints, The Globe withdrew the article from its website and Stokes apologised.

But the Globe began to ‘stoke’ this up a week ago, when another of the newspaper's bloggers, Garrett Quinn, wrote of the proposed game: "It's Catholic v Protestant.” “It's Irish v British.”

Now, normally any opinion about the rest of us that emanates from the most parochial country in the history of the planet wouldn’t merit a response, other than to point out that it would undoubtedly be as ill-informed as the CIA, Fox News or the guy that tells their military where to drop their bombs.

I have no intention of getting into any argument about whose fans done what, where and when. Nor am I going to suggest that there is any connection between the content of the stories and the fact that ‘The Globe‘ is published in Boston. What I am going to argue is that the US is a country in denial of it’s own sports fan violence.

Riots at sports events occur far more frequently in the US than the UK. But American popular culture, almost without exception, portrays the "hooligan" as a ‘soccer’ fan.

It doesn’t seem to matter that many college games end in drunken mob violence and that numerous American city centres see running battles between sports fans and riot police. The US sports media, indeed the media in general, continues to present hooliganism as something that doesn’t happen in America.

This blinkered provincialism saw the 1996 decision by the US State Department to warn US visitors to London that Millwall was as dangerous as Guatemala. A country which, at the time, was more or less governed by right-wing death squads.

A typically breathtaking example of these ill-informed double standards can be found in an article by Mickey Charles on sportsnetwork.com

Although he points out that: "There are riots in the streets after a championship comes to town in any sport. Looting, burning cars, terrorising women and ripping their clothes off as part of the ceremony seems to have reached obscene levels ..."

But he goes on to claim that this is nothing compared to the psychopaths of European football when he suggests: "... the fans rushing on to the field don't want to embrace the players. They are carrying knotted ropes used historically for lynching*, rocks, beer bottles poised to be thrown and whatever else is not nailed down. Frenzied followers of one team chase down those of the opponents, not to congratulate for a good effort, but to dismember."

*(For those unaware ‘Lynching’ is an old tradition in the US. Much favoured by the KKK in southern states)

Have none of these guys been to Philadelphia?

At a 1980s Philadelphia Eagles against the Dallas Cowboys game a Cowboys fan in a wheelchair was pushed to the top of a steep ramp by two Philadelphia fans. They ripped his Dallas shirt to shreds after threatening to push him down the ramp.

In 1997, Veterans stadium – the then ground of the Eagles - saw a fully functional court set up it’s basement, along with a small jail, after a game against San Francisco resulted in an estimated 60 fights. When the Lincoln Financial Field (the team's current stadium) opened in 2003, it was equipped with similar facilities.

And you know that things haven’t improved when one of heir own fans, Al Petrillo, talks about the “shit-faced drunk and out of control” fans beating up and breaking the leg of a 60-year-old Washington Redskin’s fan. Petrillo has worked with security at Philadelphia Flyers ice hockey games where, violence is just as rife. "Especially in the play-offs. There's fights at every game. There was this guy in a [New Jersey] Devils jersey, just sat there minding his own business. A Flyers fan walked past him then just turned around and just beat the piss out of him."

The reputation of the Eagles fans is so bad that they were congratulated by ESPN.com., when they failed to boo a little blind boy with cerebral palsy when he faltered while singing the national anthem during a snowstorm.

But it’s not all about Eagles’ fans.

Here are just some of the more famous examples of US fan violence:

In 1974 the ‘Nickel Beer Brawl’ at a baseball game at Cleveland Stadium caused the Cleveland Indians to forfeit the game to the Texas Rangers after drunken fans started a riot.

In 1984, Kansas State defeated KU at football. After the match Kansas fans rioted, smashing windows and signs, overturning a car, and uprooting street signs. Police who attempted to intervene were chased by students who hurled obscenities and bottles at them. Five police officers were cornered for a time and pelted with rocks and bottles. At one point, the Kansas Highway Patrol called Governor John W. Carlin's office to request that he declare a state of emergency and send Kansas National Guard troops to Aggieville

Two years later, despite a number of precautions, Aggieville was the site of another riot after Kansas State again defeated KU. Students wearing t-shirts that said ‘Riotville’ and ‘Riot II’ mingled amongst the crowds that filled the main street outside the bars. As night fell, the crowd again turned violent. Almost every building in Aggieville had its windows smashed.

In 1984 (one night after the first Aggieville Riot), violence erupted outside of Tiger Stadium in Detroit after the Detroit Tigers defeated the San Diego Padres in the World Series. 

A Tigers’ fan holding a World Series pennant in front of an overturned and burning Detroit Police car.

In 1990, a victory celebration in Detroit after the NBA Finals degenerated into a riot that left 7 dead.

In 1993 three people died in Chicago after the Chicago Bulls won the NBA championship.

In 1998, Denver Broncos fans rioted in the streets of Denver after their team won Super Bowl XXXII.

In 2000 Los Angeles Lakers fans rioted in the streets of Los Angeles after the Lakers victory over the Indiana Pacers in the NBA Finals - starting bonfires dancing and stomping on parked cars, and even turning a news van over.

In 2003 in Oakland, California fans rioted and destroyed property after the Oakland Raiders lost to the Tampa Bay Buccaneers in Super Bowl XXXVII. The rioting fans left several streets strewn with burnt-out cars and smashed glass. One McDonald's restaurant was looted and set on fire. Three fire-fighters suffered injuries while at least 23 people were arrested, in most cases on charges of public drunkenness. When the trouble broke out, huge squads of officers marched through the streets and authorities closed off some areas of the city.

In 2004, in a NBA game between the Indiana Pacers and Detroit Pistons, a brawl erupted between Pacers players and Pistons supporters.

And just in case a trip even to nearby Philadelphia is too much for the hacks at the Boston Globe, they might like to reflect on the events of October 2004, when fans of the Boston Red Sox rioted just outside of Fenway Park after the Red Sox won the American League Championship Series over the New York Yankees. And to take a quote from Mr Stokes “forced the local constabulary to don riot gear to restore order.” In restoring that order, Emerson College student, Victoria Snelgrove, was killed. The result of being hit in the eye by a pepper spray pellet fired from an FN 303.

Stokes need not look as far as Glasgow for a story. There is one on his doorstep.

It’s a story about a long-term deeply rooted and entirely home-grown problem that affects American sport that no one is willing to recognise exists.

It’s about mindless drunken violence inside and outside stadiums.

It’s about cop-taunting, car-burning, vandalism and death.

It’s about hooliganism.

It’s about putting your own house in order before pointing your finger at others.

Nu-Labour Make History

Another of Labour’s celebrity supporters has given us the benefit of his wisdom. This time Eddie Izzard has been encouraging young people to vote Labour, under the guise of encouraging young people to vote. Underlining the importance of the ‘right to vote’, Eddie enthused about the Levellers and Suffragettes and the idea of universal suffrage.

Ah, history as seen through fantasy-tinted spectacles. Not quite in the same league as Jim Murphy’s historical revision concerning the closure of the Ravenscraig steelworks, Eddie is at least trying it on with events outwith the living memories of most of us. The problem for Eddie though, is that young people have not been out of school as long as he has. And unlike Eddie, they might not as yet, have forgotten what they were taught.

The Levellers did not advocate universal suffrage, for, despite the important role played by many women in the Leveller cause they only demanded the vote for all men over the age of 21 - with servants, beggars and Royalists being exempt. No doubt Eddie as enlightened as he is, would be willing to give servants the vote.

As for the Suffragettes? “More power to their bustles”, I would have said.

But you have to wonder what sort of legislation the excellent comedian’s present-day heroes, Gordon Britain and Alan Johnson, would come up with if faced with a group that promoted vandalism, arson, fire-bombing and attacks on politicians as a means to achieving their demands.

On the point of universal suffrage it should be remembered, or in this case – pointed out - that until the Representation of the People Act 1948, ‘plural voting’ meant that it was possible for people affiliated with a university to vote in both a university constituency (universities were represented in Parliament) and their home constituency, while property owners could vote both in the constituency where their property lay and that in which they lived, if the two were different. University-educated property owners could vote in three different constituencies. To vote in a university seat the elector had to have graduated from that university.

You might wonder what sort of argument could be made against ‘one person – one vote’.

Sir Alfred Beit, Conservative MP for St. Pancras, South-East, could. He argued that people would vote in the constituency where they lived and not where they had a business or at the university where they had graduated. This would reduce the electorate of the City of London to charladies and office cleaners who would then, one suspects, elect MPs of a working class persuasion. And if the electorate at universities was reduced it would mean MPs being returned on a poll of a few hundreds.

 

In the end, the char ladies and office cleaners did not topple the City of London. That was left to the avarice of the bankers much admired by Beit and his ilk. The vast majority of businessmen who lived above the shop noticed no difference.

As for universities, the idea that they should be represented in parliament at all is strange to say the least. This originated in Scotland, where the representatives of the ancient universities of Scotland sat in the unicameral Estates of Parliament. When James VI inherited the English throne in 1603, the system was adopted by the Parliament of England.

The idea that the chinless wonders, brain-dead yahoos and Soviet spies of post-war Britain, that some of these seats of learning accommodated with  third-rate degrees, should have more say than the rest of the population is even stranger.

The old ‘socialist’ Labour Party got rid of this nonsense, thereby denying the likes Brown, Cameron and Clegg more than one vote.

But then, whereas ‘Old Labour’ made history – Nu-Labour are happy to make it up.

The Bully the Bigot and the Old Woman. A Cautionary Tale

Well, they wanted Gordon to meet ‘real people’ but, now that he has, they might want to change their tactics after he was caught on microphone describing one of the ‘real people’ as a "bigoted woman".

During a visit to Rochdale, pensioner Gillian Duffy pulled him up on a number of issues including immigration, crime and the economy. 

After patronising the woman, in what was really nothing more than one of those uncomfortable moments that politicians have to face during an election, the Labour leader shot himself in the foot, before putting the foot firmly in his mouth.

His comments were made after he got into his car, not realising that he still had a Sky News microphone pinned to his shirt.

He told an aide: "That was a disaster - they should never have put me with that woman. Whose idea was that? It's just ridiculous..."

Asked what she had said, he replied: "Everything, she was just a bigoted woman."

The problem for Brown was that immediately after the exchange she had said she would vote Labour. But after being told about his comments she said she would not.

The thing is that the fact that he thought it was “disastrous”. He certainly got off a lot lighter than Cameron did the day before when he was pulled up by a member of the public over his education policies. Having said that, the only difference might be the microphone. But when all said and done this would have remained a funny little story about the PM being ‘hand-bagged’ by a pensioner. It had no legs whatsoever.

Brown was "mortified" after being caught on microphone.

Exactly.

After being ‘caught’.

And since being caught we've heard nothing but how he “didn’t mean” what he said. Saying something that he doesn’t mean shouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone. But - come off it – he meant this.    

Brown later skulked round to Gillian’s house to offer a grovelling apology.

But let’s face it - an apology from an MP is not worth shit these days.

A bigot is a person utterly, obstinately or intolerantly devoted to his or her own opinions and prejudices. They show signs of obstinacy, irrationality and animosity toward those of differing devotion, creed, belief, or opinion.

Does that sound like Gillian Duffy or does it sum up Gordon Brown.

Ask the ‘real people’.

And good luck to Gillian. I hope she makes a few quid from selling her story to some red-topped rag.

Election Bollocks # 2

After a week away from the hustings I’m glad to see nothing’s changed.

The Tories still have problems with Christians who still have problems with homosexuals.

Labour still has problems with remembering what actually happened in the past.

And everything is seemingly Nick Clegg’s fault.

Two Tory local election candidates got the boot after launching an attack on John Prescott. Failing to reach Fat Bob, they settled for assaulting two nearby women.

Then there was the BNP fall out with Marmite which led to an outbreak of knee-jerking nonsense from their equally ludicrous left-wing counterparts. Although with Nick Clegg now being the country’s leading Nazi, Nick Griffin seems to have got away with it. 

Then there was Gordon.

Some of the smaller parties really have to get their act together. 

Highlands and Islands Enterprise Culture

Dozens of Highlands and Islands Enterprise staff have jumped on the last gravy train leaving it's headquarters.

It seems that employees were queuing up to get their hands on redundancy packages before changes in legislation would see their massive golden handshakes and job-jumping between agencies at public expense, brought to an end.

It was announced that 53 staff out of the 76 who applied had left through voluntary severance with pay-outs averaging £63,600, as well as one getting a nice wee £263,000 addition to his pension pot.

The new legislation will mean that public sector employees will be restricted to a maximum pay-out of £50,000 or two years' salary.

Another little bonus for this lot is that they can now walk into other public-sector jobs. The new legislation means that in future they would have to pay back some of the redundancy dosh.

However, those who opted for voluntary redundancy packages before the April 1st changes can move to another public sector job without penalty.

And why not?
This is been one the great perks of working for one of these agencies.

A couple of years back their Director of Global Communications, Stuart Black, job-jumped with a £138,000 golden handshake to take up a £100,000 a year post as director of planning and economic development with the arch money-wasters at the Highland Council two days later. At the same time, Donald McNeill who was Senior Transport Officer with the agency managed to secure himself a £43,000 a year post as Gaelic development manager with the same local authority.

HIE have assured anybody who is concerned that they can carry out all their responsibilities with the reduced complement of staff.

So it would appear that we are paying through the nose to get rid of a lot of people that we didn’t need in the first place.

Police Replace Courts

North Wales Police are investigating attempts to shine a high-powered green laser at their helicopter. 

Now without going into the whole debate about how feasible it is to blind a pilot with a laser pointer, the twats that do this should be jailed because that’s what they believe they are doing.

Inspector Steven Jones, of the force's Air support Unit, said it was a "dangerous and foolish thing to do", and culprits would be prosecuted.

However it was when  he said other forces had previously imprisoned people for similar crimes, that the story caught my attention.

Wishful thinking on the part of Jones the Plod.

Fined, Tagged and Under Curfew – The Judicial Lottery

What a great story. Old woman fined £1000, electronically tagged and placed on a 6pm-7am curfew – for selling a goldfish to a 14-year-old, thereby breaking the 2006 law which states it's illegal to sell pets to under-16s.

Mrs Joan Higgins, a 66-year-old pet shop owner was caught out in a sting operation by council officials in Manchester, who sent the youngster into the store to buy a fish. Higgins sold him the goldfish without asking his age or providing any information about the care of the fish.

A spokesman for Trafford Council defended the decision to bring the case.

Head of Public Protection (I kid you not), said: "The evidence presented for this conviction clearly demonstrates that it is irresponsible to sell animals to those who are not old enough to look after them.”

I’m pretty sure that there are plenty of under-16s capable of looking after animals. Just as many adults are not. It doesn’t take much of a trawl of the web to find evidence for this. Adults however, no matter how incapable of looking after animals, get the benefit of the doubt. That means it is usually too late for the animals when this is discovered.

It will also show the usual inconsistency in sentencing. And that’s the real problem here. We see it in relation to all sorts of crimes. It more than shows that sentencing depends on the personal views held by whichever individuals you find yourself up in front of.

This case won’t change that. But it is a timely reminder of the justice system lottery. 

Fear of Political Police Force.

The Association of Police Authorities (APA) is getting a bit worried about the idea that elected representatives might be given the power to hire and fire chief constables.

APA chief executive Mark Castle says that could lead to one group or "extremist individual" gaining control of a force and "politicising" the police.

And he’s right.

I remember Margaret Thatcher doing it, quite effortlessly, in 1984.

Pity nobody in the land of Plod saw fit to complain then.

Scottish Labour with One Foot in the Grave

Scottish Labour revealed it had signed up actor Richard Wilson - better known as Victor Meldrew from TV's ‘One Foot in the Grave’ - to support the party. How apt this may turn out to be.

Ricky Tomlinson Won’t Stand for Socialist Labour Party

So Jim Royle won’t be on the campaign. How disappointing. The Socialist Labour Party announced today that the actor who plays him - Ricky Tomlinson - won't be standing for them at the election. The party, led by Arthur Scargill, had hoped he would stand in Liverpool Wavertree, but "personal and contractual commitments have made it impossible".

Maybe just as well. For in a past life Ricky fronted a series of commercials for the privatised (former nationalised) utility, British Gas. Which of course the Socialist Labour Party would bring back into state ownership

More People Going to Jail?

Labour plan to add 15,000 prison places by 2014. The Tories plan increase prison capacity above Labour’s plans. They are doing so in order to scrap the early release scheme. Labour doesn’t say why. To suggest that the party that has introduced more prohibitive laws than ant other might just be planning to jail more people anyway, would be unfair. If not yet illegal.

Labour’s ‘English Arcadia’

You could be mistaken for thinking that this is a 1930s vision for a socialist utopia.

But the rather retro image is Nu-Labour’s idea for the future in the 21st century Britain.

Devoid, as it is, of any signs of a modern Britain, it harks back to time very reminiscent of that dreamt up in John Major’s ‘Middle England’.

Just what part of Britain it is supposed represent?

It is a rosy 21st century version of the romantic and mythical ‘English Arcadia’.

It didn’t exist then.

It obviously doesn’t exist know.

It certainly won’t exist in the future.

Confused Brown Thinks Expenses Fiddling MPs Will Pay Back Legal Aid

Gordon Brown has eventually spoken up about his former expenses fiddling MPs getting legal aid.

He said: "I think this money will have to be paid back by these politicians. I think the evidence is that people in their position will have to pay back the money - or most of the money - they get in legal aid.”

"We have actually abolished this free legal aid from the end of June, so it has to be means-tested from the end of June and they wouldn't have got it in these circumstances.

"The law has changed, so I think the money will have to be paid back."

Yesterday however, we were told by Justice Minister Jack Straw told: "It is simply a matter of chance that the means test is yet to be introduced in Southwark, where the former MPs are being tried.

"Decisions about legal aid are made by the courts, and MPs and ministers have no control over the award of legal aid in individual cases."

So what’s going on?

According to Brown, they got it but, wouldn’t have got it after June. Fair enough. That’s pretty much what the Man of Straw said.

But, this is where garbled Gordon can’t resist taking that extra step.

Nothing he said backs up his assertion that they will they have to pay it back.

The court at Southwark applied the "interests of justice" test to determine whether the MPs should receive legal aid or not. They did not apply a means-test because they are not in position to do so. However, if the MPs are convicted the trial judge could order them to pay back all or some of the costs of the case.

Evidently the Glorious Leader has already decided that they are guilty.

While, if they had started their ‘role-out’ of changes in London first and not last, then it wouldn’t be a problem. And would no doubt have saved a great deal more money.

Tory Manifesto

Quite hard to see what’s different in the Tory Book of Porkies from Gordon Britain’s Junior Tory Party Manifesto.

MPs to get vote on repealing hunting ban

Like to think this is not a major plank of the manifesto. Unlike those who support it.

Community 'right to bid' to run post offices.

Clever ruse this. Government offloads post offices that it wants to close but first offers local communities a chance to bid for them. You can bet that if the community’s bid is successful then the particular PO in question will be in a helluva state. And when it does close? Well then…

Scrap ID cards.

Can’t argue with that.

MPs Devine, Chaytor and Morley Get Legal Aid

Three former Labour MPs facing criminal charges over their expenses have won the right to have their legal fees paid for by the taxpayer.

Not surprisingly, when asked whether MPs facing expenses charges should get legal aid, Gordon Brown did not answer.

It would appear that officials applied the "interests of justice" test to determine whether the MPs should receive legal aid. The test says if a defendant is at risk of losing his or her liberty if convicted - then they are entitled to legal representation paid for by the state.

Well’ I suppose the upside of this would be, that at the end of their trial, they would get the jail.

But, I somehow doubt that very much.

Maritime and Coastguard Agency All at Sea (well three of them anyway)

Yet more nonsense from a Government agency. This time, the Maritime and Coastguard Agency.

Part of the north of Scotland coastline has been left with just three volunteer coastguards when there ought to be 10. The volunteers have left the Wick service in support of their station commander, who resigned after being accused of gross misconduct.

So what constitutes gross misconduct in the Coastguard?

Well – it’s ‘swearing’.

Norman Macleod, 63, swore while talking to his Aberdeen-based sector officer, Sandy Taylor, during a search. When told that this sort of language was “unprofessional”, he apologised. It should be noted that Mr Macleod’s sweary word was not aimed at anyone. Macleod was later given an apology by Mr Taylor, who accepted they had been working in a stressful situation at the time.

That’s OK then. All settled.

Enter the ‘Management’, this time in the guise of Coastal Safety Manager Ian Burgess. He tells Mr Macleod that he has two options. He could be suspended and given 10 days to appeal, or he could resign. In the face of such preposterous nonsense Mr Macleod, resigned.

You have to wonder what the fuck’s going on here. That a man with such experience, he was local station officer at Wick since 1982, was put in such a position.

Remarking on the loss of Mr Macleod and the other experienced volunteers the Coastal Safety Manager claimed that the area was well covered by the other stations, while there still remained three volunteers at Wick plus a lifeboat. But will Health and Safety allow just three men to crew the lifeboat?

None of this seems to worry the ‘Management’ though. As he said, “I am disappointed but these things sometimes happen and we just have to live with it.”

As long as no one dies from it then.

If this is really down to someone swearing then the Coastguard have some serious issues to address over what they consider to be their priorities. Those priorities should be about saving lives. I’m sure people being rescued from a sinking boat couldn’t give a fuck if the guy saving their lives was swearing over the radio.

Sailing types though, are probably made of stronger stuff than the delicate wee petals at the Maritime and Coastguard Agency.

Coastal Safety Manager Job Description:

Responsible for ensuring the efficient and effective management of HM Coastguard staff in the region, to meet Business Plan requirements and for maintaining the high quality of operational standards and results within the region.